I met Gail while standing in line for a banquet at the Romance Writers of America Convention in Orlando, FL. Now I’m excited to introduce her to all of you in this latest installment of my long-running series on military spouses and their true life love stories.

Q: How did you meet your husband?

I was a single mom working two jobs – daytime as a travel agent and at night as a cocktail waitress. He started coming in with his buddies and would always be in my section. He used to tell me he loved me when I handed him his rum & coke – little did I know he was serious.

Q: How did you know he was the one?

I was previously married and was in no way looking for a permanent relationship, especially someone in the military (previous husband was also navy). We had been friendly for several months – would talk a lot when he’d come in, would dance with him when it was slow (boss encouraged us to get the customers dancing). I didn’t even realize I kept asking him to dance. One night he walked in and I realized “Oh Jim’s back, wow, I’ve missed him” and then my heart stopped beating because it scared the crap out of me. Not only was he military he was from NY and planned to get out soon and move back to the Bronx. Something I really didn’t want for me and my daughter who was 4 at the time.

Q: Did you know he was in the military when you decided to marry?

Yes, I did know he was active duty. When we were on our honeymoon we talked about his career and if he should stay in until 20 years which at that time he could retire and find a civilian job. As a former navy wife I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but supported his choice to stay in. The steady pay, the health insurance all were factors especially with a small child and the hope that at least one more would be on the way some day.

Q: What challenges have military life posed for your romantic life?

He spent the first 12 years of our 14 years in duty stationed where he would either deploy for months at a time or travel frequently. This required us for quite a while to have to “relearn” each other when he’d come home. Which is nice… In a lot of ways it was like getting to have that first date again and again… all the giddiness, the butterflies in the stomach and some really passionate moments. Its been hard not to have him around to celebrate holidays, birthdays and anniversaries. We learned to celebrate before or after and it was always just a special. Valentines day without the overcrowded restaurants and grumpy staff is even better and more romantic. As far as I know neither of us have ever been tempted to cheat. For me he’s it, truly my best friend and soul mate.

Q: Many romances have dark and brooding alpha male heroes. Do you live with one in real life?

LOL, he can be brooding (I blame it on his Gemini personality), but he’s not dark. He’s more of the non-traditional alpha males – sensitive and intelligent. He was raised from the time he was 10 by a single mom (his dad died) and his older sister who is 21 yrs his senior. Most of the time he’s very take charge and decisive, but if I say something should be otherwise he will listen to me and in about 99% of the time is wise enough to know to listen to me. He’s very calm in a crisis and logical. So, if we were on a sinking ship I’d follow him without a second thought!

Q: My forthcoming novel, POISONED KISSES, is about a former soldier who was so traumatized by what he saw that he’s turned into a one man mission to arm the people he believes to be in the right. Does your husband have that kind of do-gooder complex? How has what he’s seen impacted his relationship with you?

Wow, that’s a hard one. For the most part he’s been on submarines and has been lucky enough to stay out of the ugly part although not the dangerous part of the action. He was part of the clean-up/response fleet for the Indonesian tsunami a couple of years ago. A few nightmares but otherwise he was okay. He has traveled extensively with the navy and seen a great deal of the world. I’d say what he’s seen makes him glad that he’s an American and we live in such a wonderful country, very patriotic. He is also active now with the Masons and is constantly volunteering to help out with them, especially if it means helping children. At work he’s always trying to help the junior sailors with their careers and even home life. So, yes, I’d say he has a bit of “do-gooder” complex.

How has his career impacted is relationship with me? I had to say it has made him very aware that our relationship is the most important thing. He knows that I’ll be here for him through all the good and the bad. He knows that even when work is going to hell and he’s ready to just quite, when he comes home I’ll listen and understand and then make it all go away for a least a couple of hours. He’s very supportive of me and my dreams. He never fails to tell me “I love you” or to show it. He’s a wonderful father who likes spending time with the kids. He cherishes those times because he knows that it could all change at a moments notice and he could be deployed again. And when he does, I know that he will be thinking of me and our kids every single day he is away.

Tags: gail chianese, military romance, military spouses, military wives, military-themed romance, real life love stories

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 18th, 2010 at 5:42 pm and is filed under Military Lives--Real Love Stories. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.